Oh geez. I'm a dang flying squirrel again. My bad.

The Return of the Flying Squirrel!!!

(and new dress from Athleta)

And my cat's butt...

Earrings handmade in New Mexico

Forever 21=cheap and funky for teen girls

And it doesn't hurt to have a very indulgent Grandma

Black and Blue

This is my favorite sweatshirt. My students call me The Flying Squirrel when I wear it. It's hard to fit under a coat, but it's worth it.

I alternate between loving winter and hating it. I think what i like is the change of seasons. I love having 4 seasons where I live. I neeeed constant change in my life. If things stay the same too long, i lose my mind. Why is that? I love to move, whether it is across the country or across town. I've owned and lived in my house for almost 5 years now and that's a record for me, for sure. I wish I could live in every state just for a year each.

I actually once thought I'd do that--move once a year. Like, get a waitressing job somewhere for a year, then move and do the same somewhere else until I'd been to every state in the country. I still think it's a good idea. I just need grown kids, a cool camper, and a lot of energy.

The Egg of Narcissus

unknown photo source, sorry.
All I can say is...nevermind. I'm not gonna say it.

yeah, yeah, I know...

Above: Tula, age 6

Above, the red shirt I wear when I feel like I have an attitude problem

Below: Emma and her piggy-tails

Below: Tula's birthday brunch

Below: Squish, the circle kitten

I'm sorry it's been so long. Not that it matters that much, there are only like 8 of you who visit this blog anyway. Wait, not to say that you 8 don't matter--in fact---quite the opposite. I LOVE YOU THE BEST!!! Since I've seen you last: Tula turned six, my newest cat got spayed, and my mother-in-law passed away.
Quite the roller-coaster.
So the thing I'm dealing with the most constantly is Kitty's death. I knew she was sick, I knew her time was limited, and I understood what it meant that she was under hospice care.
None of that matters in the end. We got THE phone call at 3am, January 31st. When a relative is gravely ill and the phone rings at 3am, you know what it is for.
And still, your heart skips a beat.
She was my mother-in-law, not my mother, so it is lesser pain than my husband should be feeling (though he doesn't show it, it must be there), but boy, I miss her. I really do.
Isn't it weird that we all know about death, we've probably all lost someone, but it is still so hard to wrap our heads around the concept of death? It's just too bizarre. I just can't understand how someone is so gone after being so here.
Sometimes I have this moment when I'm lying in bed at night, about to fall asleep, when I swear, for a split second, I know what death is. I can feel the truth of that gone-ness. That absolute non-existence.
Then the moment is gone. Then I am terrified in the aftermath of that split second.
Death sucks.
On a lighter note, I hope you like the outfits I posted, including one of the birthday girl in her yellow Spring princess dress, and the one of my kitten being a perfect circle. Like life and death. A perfect circle.
An imperfect circle.